Tuesday, July 12, 2022

The Scents (Sense?) of America

I've started doing most of my grocery shopping at Walmart because my local grocery store was always out of something (usually several somethings) and prices seemed to be quite a bit higher than at Walmart. It's not my favorite place, but I do look for ways to entertain myself while I'm there. Sometimes these things make me just shake my head and other times I laugh out loud. Yesterday was a laugh-out-loud kind of day when I passed a display of candles on an end cap. I had to go back to read the fine print and take a few pictures. 

This bright yellow candle caught my eye and I needed to take a closer look.


What does Chicago smell like? It's not deep-dish pizza, the Chicago River, or Lake Michigan. How about Green Floral, Water Lily, and Apple Blossom? I don't personally associate any of those with Chicago, but how about some other locations?


Wait, the Appalachian Mountains smell like Green Floral, Water Lily, and Apple Blossom, too! That might be a little closer to the smells of the Appalachian Mountains than Chicago, but I'm betting that Chicago and the Appalachian Mountains do smell quite different.

How about Bergamot, Rose, and Vetiver for the Grand Canyon? I don't think so. They couldn't include sage as one of the scents? Vetiver is described as earthy and woody, so that might be okay. 


But look, Austin also smells like Bergamot, Rose, and Vetiver! I was only ever in Austin once a long time ago and it smelled a lot like sulfur. I was told it was because of the oil fields, but that doesn't sound like an enticing candle scent. 

Los Angeles smells like Salted Sea Spray, Aquatic, and Moss. Maybe, but I think Walmart is just running out of descriptors. Is Salted Sea Spray really different than Aquatic? What does Aquatic smell like? 


Miami is Mango, Starfruit, and Neroli. Looks like maybe they came close on this one. Neroli is described as citrusy and floral, so I can almost imagine Miami smelling like these.


But I saved the worst one for last. The Rocky Mountains smell like Marine Moss, Citrus, and Driftwood. I've been to the Rocky Mountains and none of those things are found there. Really this one is the best because it made me laugh the most. I can just picture some poor person at the candle factory who has been charged with describing these "Explore America" candles. At the end of a long, hard, day of candle-making, they just throw three words into the mix so they can finally go home. I also imagine this person as somewhat geographically challenged so they don't understand that Marine Moss, Citrus, and Driftwood just aren't part of the Rocky Mountains (at all)!

I am easily amused, but the whole idea of exploring America by way of candle scents is one that I might expect to find at Walmart. To be honest, the candles all smelled the same to me, kind of like strong old lady perfume. But thanks for making my shopping trip a little more amusing, Walmart!

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Be sure to stop by Carole's blog today as she is doing the first of our promotional posts for the current Read With Us book, Sorrow and Bliss. You've still got plenty of time to get a copy, read it, and join us for the discussion on September 13th!

10 comments:

  1. OMG - I am laughing out loud too. What a hoot! I love that Chicago and the Appalachian Mountains smell the same...and that the Rocky Mountains smell like driftwood. What????

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  2. Oh. Brother. I am just dying laughing over here! I can't think of anyone I'd rather shop at Walmart with than you, Bonny. Thanks for taking me along virtually. XO

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  3. Worst marketing ever! hahaha! I'm bummed they didn't have one for Boston or Massachusetts, though, I'd have loved to have seen their take on it.

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  4. This is hysterical! I guarantee you these are made in some other country (China, most likely) by people who have never smelled any of these places. I'm also thankful there's not a Philadelphia candle, because it would likely smell like urine and hot garbage.

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  5. Did Pittsburgh have a candle? Inquiring minds are dying to know! Perhaps they could do a Heinz Candle... since they have left the Steelers Stadium High and Dry, perhaps they need a new gig! LOL

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  6. Absurdities abound these days, and not just in candle scents! What's really surprising is that people will buy them. I understand completely about trying to find a grocery store that has what you need. I am currently shopping at 3 of them in rotation to get everything I need, and I don't need anything exotic or rare. Congratulations on keeping your sense of humor no matter where you go, Bonny! And thanks for sharing it with us.

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  7. Sarah took thought. Philadelphia would smell like urine, week old cheesesteaks, and disappointment.

    Thanks for the laugh this morning.

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  8. The marketing that goes on these days is ridiculous but we may as well laugh at it. A sense of humor is essential and thank you for making me smile.

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  9. Thanks for the smiles. A sense of humor is essential to a healthy life and you've just improved mine.

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