I've been thinking all week about the highs and lows this year. Some are obvious - we're still in the pandemic but we now have vaccines, the former president is no longer in office but things are just as divided politically, and just yesterday I heard arguments for both sides about Bernie Sanders at Joe Biden's inauguration. He might have looked like a cold and grumpy old man, but by selling merchandise with this photo on it, he raised nearly 2 million dollars for charities in Vermont. There are times that I am cold and grumpy, but I have yet to benefit any charities by being a grumpy, old woman.
I've also been considering my personal highs and lows of 2021. I looked through old blog posts and made several lists but finally decided that just one of each stood out.
We lost my 33-year-old nephew in May of this year due to an overdose. He had gone to rehab and been clean for three years, but some issues were just too large to overcome. His death has profoundly changed my sister's life and affected our whole family. I'm trying to learn the most helpful things to do and say for my sister. I'm also learning that there isn't much you can do or say that will make things any better when a parent loses a child, all you can do is be present and offer support, acceptance, and love.
The high point that stood out was finally being able to help Ryan move back from Colorado. We tried to do this in 2020, but it was fraught with innumerable difficulties, and none of us felt safe selling his house or traveling to move him before we were all able to be fully vaccinated in 2021. The housing market was crazy but we were able to buy a house here in the east because his house in CO had appreciated quite a bit. We were lucky enough to find him a nice house in a good location, and after packing, driving back from CO, getting his stuff unloaded into a storage facility while he lived with us for a month, we were finally able to move his stuff into his new house. It was only a couple of weeks later that he had a flooded basement after receiving 11 inches of rain from Hurricane Ida, but we helped out with multiple Shop Vacs and dehumidifiers. John has been showing Ryan how to do some electrical and plumbing work, and our exciting New Year's Eve plans include replacing the wax seal, flange, and bolts on one of his toilets. Excitement abounds!
The low this year was so very low and the high point was so good that it makes 2021 feel like a very manic-depressive year to me. What were some of your own highs and lows this year? My wishes for 2022 include health, happiness, safety, time spent in nature, creativity, and life lived on a bit more of an even keel.
Oh wow! Definite highs and lows for you this year Bonny. I, too, hope that 2022 is more peaceful and easy going. Your New Year's Eve plans sound so exciting!! LOL We will be home, as usual. I'm thankful that C&M will be celebrating at home too with just a few friends. No need for me to worry about them being out and about on such a crazy evening (for so many).
ReplyDeleteOh, Bonny, I guessed your high, but I had forgotten about your nephew's death. His death is so tragic, and how do you comfort someone grieving from what appears to be an unnecessary death? By doing just what you are doing. When my mother committed suicide there was nothing that would help, and I was in a very bad place for a long time. The few people who were wise enough to be present (when I would allow it) and let me know time and again that they loved me through their actions were the people who gave me what I needed. And the man who suggested that the best way to deal with it was to help others and stop thinking of myself made me furious at the time, but he was right. I hope your sister and your family are able to find acceptance over time.
ReplyDeleteRyan's home! That is indeed something to be ecstatic about! My NY's plans are to read a good book, knit a bit, and count my blessings. My blessings are legion, and I need to remind myself of that during these trying times. Happy, happy New Year! My wish for us all is that we successfully roll with whatever comes.
Highs that are so good barely seem possible against the lowest of lows. You are right...Bi-Polar 2021 for sure!
ReplyDeleteLost/Found/Lost again/Found again? The roller coaster with my sister continues.
The consistent good though... Genevieve, Winston, and Olivia!
Our New Year plans? A bit of champagne and a quiet evening... lol the joys of getting old!
You may actually corner the market this year when it comes to highest-of-highs and lowest-of-lows, Bonny. Which is a good reminder that life is full of wonderful things AND the most unpleasant surprises -- and that one year (and our hearts) can hold both. I'm hoping for an even-keeled 2022 for all of us. XO
ReplyDeleteOur family had some great highs in 2021, including a visit from Brant's family in Florida and our trip to Iceland for Hannah's wedding. The lows, I think, were (fortunately for us) the ongoing concern with the pandemic and staying isolated and safe and the way politics have uncomfortably divided our family.
ReplyDeleteI'd say our highs were all getting vaccinated and being able to get together with family again. Lows were just the ongoing difficulties and frustrations with the virus. We thankfully did not lose anyone close to us, but it feels like the walls are starting to close in a bit because we know a lot of people who've gotten sick in recent weeks than we did in all of the previous year plus. I am hoping that 2022, we all experience more time in between high and low.
ReplyDeleteYour low is a tough one. We lost a good friend in the same way and we've been present for his wife as much as she needs. What a rough Christmas the "first one" is. I'm so sorry Bonny!
ReplyDeleteYour high is an exciting one, to have both your boys nearby is a real joy and will be life changing for you all.
Love you Dee!!!! I agree that getting together is the BEST - hopefully soon again.
ReplyDeleteI understand your low of lows - a life long friend of mine lost her son too. We stand by and follow her lead. Having Ryan back...I'm jumping up and down for you. That is a blessing my friend. xo
ReplyDeleteYou certainly had a roller coaster of a year. I am glad you have both sons near to you. Highs for us were being able to travel and see your children, hug the grands, be with my sister, and a few golden days in Minnesota with my siblings. The low was my brother's untimely death. More than ever, this year teaches me to continue to treasure time with loved ones.
ReplyDeleteBest description of 2021 "Manic Depressive Year" Yep.
ReplyDeleteMany people could probably describe their year that way!
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